


Fractured but Homestuck

by no_remedy_for_memories



Category: Homestuck, South Park
Genre: Developing Relationship, F/F, M/M, awesome southstuck crossover, everyone's at least 16, spoilers for everything lol, super hero crossover au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-26
Updated: 2016-04-25
Packaged: 2018-06-04 09:15:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6651916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/no_remedy_for_memories/pseuds/no_remedy_for_memories
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The game SBURB glitched, and everybody somehow ended up in Colorado, although separated. South Park's heroes kick in to save the others for the sake of defeating the evil villains which followed the SBURB heroes. </p><p>With everyone's help together, will they be able to defeat Lord English and the silhouetted men? Will they be able to defeat the game SBURB without being within game boundaries? </p><p>Follow the adventures of really gay heroes who never knew that they were pretty damn gay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fractured but Homestuck

**Author's Note:**

> Everybody's probably going to be really OOC, but bare with me, here!  
> Also, if there's any mistakes, biggest apologies. I might not have read it properly.  
> And those of you looking forward to your incredibly gay ships: They're probably not going to start until later on in the series! Don't worry, I'm making myself suffer, too.
> 
>  **IMPORTANT NOTE:**  
>  THE HUMOR IN THIS FANFIC WILL HAVE OFFENSIVE HUMOR!!  
> Because, well, South Park and Cartman.

"Another report of a blue superhero was made just now! He seems to stopping robbers from robbing the bank! What's this? Whoa! He's using wind powers! Incredible, such strong power for wind! Get a close up shot of that guy, Jerry!"

The T.V is shut off, Mysterion, pacing back and forth. He tosses the black remote control at The Human Kite, who catches it while off-guard and fumbling with it for a bit, before it rests in his hands. The heroes look up at the other, covered in shades of gray.

"This is bad." He says, shaking his head. "This is very, very bad." His forced, deep voice states negatively. "These weird hero encounters out of nowhere is starting to get out of hand. It's not that they're stealing our spotlight, but they've caused more dangerous villains to come lurking out there, wherever. This wasn't a problem until they showed up. Whoever they are, wherever they came from, we need to find them now. They're causing catastrophe and it's disrupting the peace of South Park!" He faces the T.V, hands crossed behind his back. "They're scattered all over Colorado. Surely, that means that those black silhouettes have followed them as well." He whips around, looking at everybody with a stern gaze. "Do you hear me? They could be causing trouble right now in South Park, or in another area of Colorado! We must find each and every... 'Hero.' They are wearing clothing that you can't mistake for casual wear. We must find out about their reason for coming here, and we must find them all as soon as possible! Do you hear me?" The other heroes who were sitting and listening to him raised a fist when he did, letting out a mighty scream. "Disperse! Travel in groups or do not, just find these powerful beings and escort them here!" 

Most ran in different directions, some staying behind. Toolshed and The Human Kite looked at each other with worried looks before stepping up to Mysterion with slight doubt. Toolshed ran a gloved hand through his jet black hair, The Human Kite adjusting his kite and making sure it's good for flight. They look at each other once more, causing Mysterion to lose patience.

"Hey dude, uh, about the whole looking for the other heroes thing," Toolshed starts, looking at The Human Kite for help on what he was about to say. However, the kite replied with a shake of his head. "Are you sure about this?" He continues. Mysterion raises an eyebrow, but it useless because of the mask that hid his face. He crosses his arms and looked back and forth between the two, question mark glued to his hood bouncing.

"What do you mean?" He questions. The Human Kite steps forward, looking at Toolshed and back at Mysterion. He fiddles with his fingers, thinking about all the things he should say that explains what their opinion on this is.

"Well, what we mean is, the heroes could probably get the wrong message and think we're villains! And, you know, kill us!" Kite's arms are open wide in a gesture, a habit he's had since he was younger. The habit only grew and hand gestures were still as frequent as ever. "You know, with all the ass kicking they've been doing, they're pretty scary." The Kite points out, frowning slightly.

Mysterion only sighs, shaking his head slightly. "I understand where you're coming from, but for now, please. Just go find the heroes. I'll explain my plans once all of them are here." He holds out his cape and turns, and with that, he disappears, ending their short conversation. Toolshed and Kite looked at each other.

"Well, that just happened." Toolshed breaks the silence, looking at The Human Kite. "So, Kyle, where do you wanna look first? The robbery was recent, maybe we could find that blue hero around that area! Since he saved the bank from a robbery, maybe he's the safest to go look for." Excited for their mission, Toolshed and The Human Kite took off from the base, arguing where the bank was.

"We've been here since we were born, how can you not remember where the bank is, Stan?" Kyle shouts, running and trying to navigate through the darkness. Stan scoffs, rolling his eyes and nearly stumbling, catching his balance and seeing the bank in the distance.

"It's Toolshed! And I don't know, it's dark and past my bedtime, okay? And I think that's the bank over there!" He squints. Unfortunately, luck was not on their side as they tripped over a leg. They both look up, and are frightened when they see the black figure of a hatted man, a white eye patch covering his left eye. 

"Aw, shit, dude. We're so dead." Kite mumbles to Toolshed, who just nods. Spades Slick lets out a hefty laugh, pulling out a dagger. 

"Look what I've got here, a couple o' wimps trying to save the day, huh? Too bad you two ain't got much time to live, after this." He lifts his arm and lets it come down, but a powerful breeze mislead his hand from Kyle's heart to luckily, Kyle's arm. He screams in pain and he's happy that they're in the dark, otherwise seeing the blade come down to his arm would have been even more painful.

"Kyle!" Stan shouts, pulling the dagger out of his arm without second thought and tossing it to the ground. He looks around for something to cover the wound, for now using his arm. "Kyle, dude, you okay?" While Stan is trying to handle his friend's wound, Slick looks around and tries to locate the source of the wind. Kyle, whimpering and dizzy from the blood loss, faints in Stan's arms. Stan stares in shock at the amount of Kyle's blood on his hand. "Kyle, no!" He screams, tears running down his face. "Stay with me, dude!" 

A blue figure leaps down from the rooftop of a building, roundhouse kicking Spades Slick in the jaw and knocking him out. "Here, come with me, one of my friends should know how to deal with a wound like that." He says, picking up the limp body of The Human Kite. He sprints off, Stan happy that he joined the track team because if he didn't, he would have lost track of where the mysterious hero had run off to. 

Stan nearly lost them when the blue hooded hero turned into an alleyway, but was pulled in when he nearly ran past. "In the garbage, quick!" He said, pointing at the pile of trash. Confused, Toolshed looked at the other. "What? Nobody suspects a hidden base in there." Blue guy points out. The other shrugs and jumps in, causing the hooded to burst out in laughter. 

"Wait a minute! There is no hidden base in here, is there?" Stan growls, head poking out from the disgusting trash bags. Blue dude shakes his head, still laughing.

"Nope! God, you're such an idiot!" He snorts from laughter, and he laughs so hard that it goes silent, and he takes in a deep breath before bursting out into tears of laughter once more. Stan glares at the unnamed guy, stepping out of the mountains of trash bags and adjusting his goggles. 

"Fuck you, man. Seriously." Stan grumbles, wiping off the excess trash. "Dude, why'd you do that for?" 

"Just seeing if you're as stupid as my other friends who I pranked!" He replies when he gains back his breath. He turns to the door behind him, knocking on it rhythmically. The door swings opens and a lady who looks similar to him is on the other side.

"John?" She asks, slightly frowning. "Who's with you?" The other hero who's name is apparently John, shrugs, stepping in and letting Toolshed come in as well. 

"I dunno, I found them with Slick. Here, Jane, this guy's hurt pretty badly and I think he bled to death while I was laughing my ass off at my fantastic pranks, but you can revive people, right?" John hands Jane the body, walking off and taking off his hood.

"Wh- John! Jeez, I can only revive a person once, and I don't even know if I could to people outside of SBURB! Don't recklessly put someone's life on the line because you think that they can be healed, you're lucky this boy's still breathing." Jane scolds her friend, disappearing into a room. "What did I tell you about bringing random people over, also!" She shouts from the room.

John rolls his eyes, jumping onto the couch with his arms behind his head. Stan blinks, pushing his goggles up to rest against his head. "So uh. Are you two dating?" Stan asks curiously. John lets out a laugh, shaking his head.

"Who, Jane? Nah, it's pretty complicated, though. She's like... My offspring? Or was it me being her offspring? It's confusing. She's like, my Nanna, and I was her 'Poppop' or something. I do have a girlfriend, though! Or, had. That's confusing, also. SBURB's confusing. What about you? Was that friend of yours your brother or something? Half brother?" John sits up, patting an open space for Stan. He takes the spot, looking at John confusedly. 

"Kyle? No, he's not my brother. You see, we're 'Super Best Friends.' He was also kind of my wingman for a bit, but he dropped out of that for some reason. Who are you, anyways? And who was she? Can I trust her with Kyle?" Stan begins to question, frowning slightly. John nods, looking at the door of the room Jane was in.

"Yeah, Jane's like a mother, kind of. So are some of my other friends. She's a healer, and she's pretty cool, y'know? She's the Maid of Life. That's what one of my friends said, anyways. She can do this cool revival thing, while I can do the windy thing! I'm the Heir of Breath, which sounds pretty cool, right? Doesn't compare to Jane, though. My real name is John Egbert, just in case you haven't picked up." John clarifies, leaving Stan slightly confused and processing all the new information.

"Whoa." He gasps. He shakes his head, gathering his consciousness again and clearing his throat. Sitting up, he decides to begin with an introduction. "I'm Toolshed, and I have the power to manipulate tools!" To demonstrate, Stan tosses a drill in the air and catches it without his hands, via mind. "It's kind of like telekinesis, but over tools. Hence, Toolshed! Oh right, my actual name is Stan. Stan Marsh." He reaches and grabs the drill, sliding it back into his belt.

"Wow, that's pretty neat! What about your friend? Uh, Kyle, was it? What's his superpower? I mean, he has a kite. On his back." 

"Yeah, it's Kyle. He can fly. Or, well, glide. He's pretty much a human kite. That's his superhero name, actually! The Human Kite! He can also shoot lasers out of his eyes. It's pretty amazing." Stan explains, smiling subconsciously at the thought of Kyle. "His costume looks stupid as hell, though. Don't tell him I said that." The last part causes John to chuckle, standing up.

"It does kind of look stupid. Also, I love it when my kite shoots lasers out of it's nonexistent eyes. It's totally logical! Want anything to eat?" John offers, walking into the kitchen. Stan thinks for a moment. He realizes that he hasn't had dinner yet and is pretty damn hungry.

"Yeah, some food would be great. And don't make fun of his powers!" Stan decides and warns, sneaking into the kitchen as well.

"I forgot to mention. My best friend, Dave, has time powers. He's the Knight of Time, or something like that. He's kind of like a time traveler! I think he can clone himself by time traveling, too? He's pretty cool and ironic! I hope he hasn't replaced me as his best friend, I really miss him. We haven't really talked much ever since we started the game." John says, smoothing out the jam with the butter knife on his peanut butter and jelly sandwich. He passes a slice to Stan, who takes it with gratitude.

"Wow, the way you're describing him, it sounds like you're gay for your best friend!" Stan jokes, taking a bite of the sandwich. "By the way, this is some quality shit, here." He says, mouth full and getting crumbs everywhere.

"Pft, well that's not the case, I'm not a homosexual, you see! I also had a girlfriend? Have? Yeah, it's still confusing as ever. Her name's Vriska. I think I broke up with her, I don't know. It was in a dream or something. A SBURB ghost dream or whatever. What's it called? Dream bubbles? Something like that. Also, thanks, my dad taught me how to make good peanut butter and jelly sandwiches!" Jane walks into the kitchen, looking at John suspiciously.

"John... What are you eating?" She questions, looking at the sandwich half in his hand. John swallows the piece he was chewing, pointing at his half.

"Peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Why?"

"John, you're allergic to peanuts!"

"OH SHIT I AM!"

John wheezes and grabbed a hold on the kitchen counter, the three panicking.  

* * *

Kyle jolts awake, panting. He tries to move his right arm but pain shoots up his arm. "Ah, shit." He mutters, hand going to his arm. He mumbles various of swear words, trying to remember what happened. Oh, that's right, he got stabbed in the fucking arm. At least he wasn't raped. And, oh! It looks like the sun is rising. Except, something's missing...

Where's his best friend?

"Stan? Stan, are you there?" Kyle shouts. He successfully summons Stan, who comes crashing in and hugging his super best friend in tears. 

"Kyle! Kyle, man, I was so scared of losing you! It's been a couple of days and even though they've been saying that you're definitely okay and that you were just resting, I was still scared of losing you!" He sobs into his friend's bare chest. He pulls away and looks at the white bandage wrapped around Kyle's right arm. "Are you okay, dude? Was the injury serious? Does it hurt? I brought your hat!" Stan holds up the familiar green ushanka hat that Kyle always wore, wiping the tears away with the sleeves of his jacket.

"Uh, whoa, calm down, Stan. Also, that's really gay," Kyle jokes, laughing quietly. "I'm fine, it doesn't feel like I'm going to die any time soon right now. My arm aches a lot, but I'll live." Kyle puts his hand on the bandaged, quickly healing wound. He does grab the hat and slide it over his head, though.

"Do you want breakfast? Breakfast in bed, maybe? John can make really good pb and j." Stan suggests. Kyle nods his head, but confusion washes over his face.

"John?" He asks. "Who the fuck is John?" Stan rubs his hand behind his neck, realizing that Kyle wasn't conscious when he was talking to John. 

"John's the blue hero. You know, the one on the news? When you passed out, he saved our asses. Lucky us, huh? Oh right, there's also this hot chick here named Jane. She helped heal you as good as new. Almost?" Stan explains to the confused other teen, standing up and stretching. "Well, I'm gonna go ask John to make you that sandwich, and call Kenny to tell him where we are." He leaves, having Kyle's loneliness flood back.

"Aw, man. I fucked up bad. At least my arm's alright, right? How're you doing, arm? Oh no, I'm worse than Butters."

**Author's Note:**

> Hooo shit's going down!  
> 2 heroes down, a number more to go. Forming friendships between two characters is fun! And if you spot a mistake, please do point it out for me. For now, have some platonic Style before it gets hot and romantic up in here.


End file.
